Cute, Win, Fail



EPISODE 3

Double-Stuffed Episode​

Hello, audience! My name is Gustavus Adolphus Rex, I am so addicted to Coca-Cola it's not even funny, and this is Cute, Win, Fail! The formerly a blog and now a kids' TV show brought to you by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting[1]- oops, I mean the Europeian Broadcasting Corporation- where three Europeian posts compete to become the most:



Last week, you saw an Anumia Incest Cute from Anumia and Earth22, a 90s Image Win from Henry, and a Baby Windowsill Fail from Abbey Anumia. Your unbelievable amount of hanging chads have been appealed to the Supreme Court by Al Gore and the MOST EPIC EUROPEIAN POST EVER (of last week) is:

Henry's 90s Image Win!

It's simply too epic to be even shown as an image here, so here's the linky:

http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/90s.jpg



Congratulations, Henry! You get this clipart image as a prize! :D



Sorry other two posts! You must be sacrificed to appease the angry forum gods!!!! *The two posts are "accidentally" dropped into a volcano!* That's gonna hurt in the morning! :p Now let's drop these next FIVE posts onto a deserted island for 39 days to see who will have it what it takes to survive! Yes, you heard me- there will be an extra Win and an extra Fail this episode! GASPS! :eek:

Our first post comes from Rachel McAdams- I mean the Europeian Rachel lawl- who started the topic New NS Daughter off with:

"I'd like to announce that Silver Steps is now the NS daughter of PASD and myself.
hyper.gif hyper.gif"

She should probably have also announced that those two smileys ate waaaay too much sugar this morning and showed up to work that morning high.

But I'm calling this a:



I mean come on, Rachel McAdams! Nice choice of an avatar! ;) Oh, and PASD and Rachel are absolutely adorable together, and the addition of a BABY...! :wub: That basically overloads my cute-o-meter! :D

Our next post is the first:



This comes from HEM, who posted this here Presidential Approval Rating poll of Oliver Dion-Grey with the words "Have at it."

And we did, with one of us giving him 100% approval, seven voting 90%, seven voting 80%, two voting 70%, four voting 60%, one voting 50%, and two people daring to vote 0% who afterwards wandered into a dark alley and were never seen again. ;) evil.gif

But anyway, this means a lot of people approve of the job Oliver Twist has been doing so far as President of Europeia. And I think that's partly because he presidentificated over our next:



This goes out to all of the tireless (and probably caffeinated beyond belief) recruiters in Europeia who helped get our power level up to OVER ONE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND NATIONS! Yeah babe-eh, you know that's right! :D Soon, world domination will be ours! :lol:

Then mberg5472 had to ruin it by starting a topic called A piece of news!, where he said:

"Hello fellow members of Europeia!

I have an offer to make. We are all here because of various reasons, wether we love politics, or love simulations we are still present here.

I haven't been a member of Europeia very long, but I can already tell everyone here that is active within the forums has talent!

Therefore I would love it if all of you could take the time and check out this other RPG I play as well as Nationstates. It is called City Empires. www.cityempires.net

I just created a new country and need new citizens! This could be a way for us to make a stronger friendship!

Please join today. Reply to this post if your interested. I'll help you join and help you play! Contact me today! I play as the city of Miami in the game.

I would love it if I could have trusted members from Europeia playing in my country on city empires!"

A piece of news? More like a piece of shit advertising! :angry:

Anumia said in reply, "Oh, this isn't going to end well..."

Hmmm, no kidding, you think? If by not ending well you mean we get to throw rocks at this idiot, then yeah, I'm up for it. :ph43r:

To which Fortana fortana-tuitously added, "And some people say the Europeian Nationalism Act was foolish :p." That's a little mini-win for you right there.

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for...sick him, Lethen!

"We don't really appreciate people advertising other games here in Europeia...and why did you choose this forum of all places?"

Ohhhh, ownified! And it looks you get a nice, juicy...



...sandwich. That's slathered in humiliation sauce with a side of newbie. Need I say anything more? :p

Actually, I will, because is up next is our final post for this week, a topic from Anumia called Ugh. Here, he declares:

"So, it turns out my brother is tone-deaf. Or tone-mute. No, must be tone-deaf. Otherwise he would hear how far off-key he is and how he can't even hold those butchered notes and SHUT THE HELL UP.

It also turns out that he's been singing repetitive songs at a loud volume throughout the night and all morning (it's now past midday). I've been trying to sleep before the night shift at work while he's been either destroying songs I once liked, or imprinting techno beat songs that have one line of lyrics repeated for four minutes onto my suffering consciousness.

Also, my eyes have been stinging whenever I close them, -because- I'm tired. ...and it's hot.

...but mostly, the issue is that ten feet outside my sound-permitting door and walls is the greatest argument for the existence of Satan.

AA, you know where to aim. Clean shot between the eyes please. *sits still and waits*

-_-"

Unfortunately for the supporters of the economy, AA decided not to end Anumia's misery. :lol: Oh, and, Anumia's brother, whoever you are, you may suck at singing big time, but you have my sympathies. ^_^ I often have been consternated by my family for beng horrible when I'm singing along to the car radio. Maybe we can start a Failed Singers Anonymous support group together, with you as the founder.

Nah, never mind, I take that back. I mean, you chose techno! Even if you didn't screw those beats left, right, and center, they would STILL stink. At least start with songs that are more appropriate for your skill level, like, oh, I don't know, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star? But until you become a great singer, enjoy your:



T-t-t-that's all for this show, folks! So, which one was the most EPIC?! Was it the NS Baby Cute by Rachel Not-McAdams, the Oliver Twist Poll Win by Oliver Dion-Grey, the Over 1000 Nations Win by Europeian recruiters, the Piece of Shit Advertising Fail, or the Anumia's Brother Singing Fail by Anumia? Post your vote in the comments and tune in next week to see who won! Gustavus Adolphus Rex out! :D

[1]Anyone who watched PBS as a kid and obsessively memorized the end funding credits like I did knows what I'm talking about. :p
 
Click to expand...
Earth22 said:
Only 8,000 more to go til we're OVER 9,000!!!!! :p

My vote goes to 1,000!
Click to expand...
If we did that, then I think HEM could basically own all of NationStates, since no region is over 9000 atm. :p

Thanks for voting! ^_^

And come on people, check out the other things! They could die if they don't get your votes! J/K lol KILL THEM! :p
 
That was actually a pretty toned-down thing for me to say to the kid. Were the ENA still in effect...I'd have been bitchier. But threatening and bitching with the ECC doesn't have the same ring to it.
 
Hey guys, I just want to let you all know that we have until...*counts on fingers* one, two, 99 :p...you guys have until Tuesday to vote for which post or event was the most epic in Europeia ever of this week?! Please, votes will make me happy! :D
 
Oliver Dion-Grey said:
Gustavus Adolphus Rex said:
Hey guys, I just want to let you all know that we have until...*counts on fingers* one, two, 99 :p...you guys have until Tuesday to vote for which post or event was the most epic in Europeia ever of this week?! Please, votes will make me happy! :D
Click to expand...
There's...no poll...on this topic...
Click to expand...
Well, then you guys can vote in the comments section. It's pretty easy. ^_^

Sorry if this is confusing, but I want to be able to have multiple CWF issues in the same topic- I was having a hard time keeping track of them all.
 


EPISODE 4​

Hello audience! I'm Gustavus Adolphus Rex, I am totally bro minions with Will.em the Flying Dutchman, and this is Cute, Win, Fail! The EBC blog where three Europeian posts compete to become the most:



Last episode, I served up an NS Daughter Cute, Oliver Twist Poll and 1000 Nations Wins, and the Piece of Shit Advertising and Anumia's Brother Singing Fail. I asked Rexy to tell me what the scouter says about the level of votes, and he said that the most epic Europeian event ever of last week WAS (dum dum dum!!!!):

Europeia 1000 Nations Win!



EUROPEIA SMASH!

Sorry other four posts, you're about to crushificated by GIANT ROCK STONE TEXT!!!! Hit it, Rexy!



Ooh, that's gotta hurt for your faceholes. :p

Hey, audience, is it just me, or is there just way too much win in this region. Come on, give Fail a chance! :lol:

So today, I'll be starting off with a



Just to shake things up a bit, yo, we have Asianatic (wawa in the house, dog!) She earns the Fail for this week with her topic Somebody save me, please...:

I'm going on my third-freakin' snow day.  The entire metroplex is in a tizzy because our temperatures have stayed below freezing for like three days now.  Not that, y'know, this is what happens in the north all the time.

-runs around the house alternating screaming and whining-
Click to expand...

Are...you...KIDDING ME?! :eek: I would sell my own kidney on the black market just to have one snow day, let alone three! (Not really- maybe a piece of my liver, though :p). We had major snowfall here in D.C. a few days ago, and American University only canceled the early morning classes- and guess who doesn't have classes at 8:30. ME?!

So, Wawa, let me play you a sad song on the world's smallest violin. Also, any idea what planet she's from? Enjoy your fail, however you say that word in Martian. :p

Roll the next post, Rexy! Next up, we have AA in the topic So Apparently I'm Doing My Daughter, who says:

I just adopted my girlfriend in NS.
She is now known as Irene Anumia of Thrace.

So yay I guess. :p
Click to expand...

This is automatically



in either a "Awwwwwwwwww, WUB!" :wub: sort of way, a "Hotototototototot!!!!" sort of way, or a "EWWWW gross incest cooties!" sort of way. I don't really know which. But AA, you can definitely add that to your AA County of Weird. Also, you get a Mini-Win for causing us to talk about Latter Assassins.

They kill you and then drink lattes- FROM YO BLAHD! :ph43r: And when they kill you, you will ooze EPIC. :p

Anyway, this episode, I've saved the



for last! Let's do this thing, audience! :D

Our last post for this week comes from Skizzy Fo-Nizzy the Grey, who created the topic I have a wet dream

A word makes a world of difference.  If MLK stood on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial and said he had a wet dream, school would probably be open on his birthday.

I have a wet dream …

… that Ty will finally post a picture on the Faces thread, because she strikes me as the sort of woman who underrates herself.

… that I will wake up one morning next to Earthie's avatar, or maybe Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Yes, those two movies dropped right in the middle of my adolescent self-discovery phase. Yes, I've touched myself while thinking of cartoon characters. Got a problem with that?  Didn't think so.

… that Henry will realize that if it's not worth his time to edit his prose to make his point clear, it's not worth our time to read what he writes.

… that someday, when a Europeian posts thinly veiled attacks masquerading as platitudes, we'll let the intended target(s) respond as though they were directly attacked, without nodding to the charade.

… that someday, when a Europeian tries to convince the father of a disabled child that there's nothing wrong with making fun of retarded kids, technology will miraculously develop to permit said father to reach into his computer, pull out said jokester, tear his head off and s--t down his neck hole.

F--k it, sign me up for one of these newspaper thingies. I have opinions, pent-up aggression and a sharp tongue; what could possibly go wrong? :unsure:
Click to expand...

:eek:

:eek:

:eek:

:eek:

:lol: :lol:

hyper.gif flail.gif

Nothing I could ever say would ever do this post justice, so I will simply repost the word



for dramatic effect!!!! :p

Which was the most EPIC? Was it the Snow Day Appreciation Fail, the Doing Your NS Daughter Cute, or the Skizzy Wet Dream Win?

Vote in the poll or post a comment-



This show sponsored by Nike! :p And if you have a Cute, Win, or Fail that you would like to appear in next week's show, then send me a PM or email or MSN me at gustavusrex2010@live.com. That's all for this week, folks!

But before I go, I leave you with the Cute Win Fail Epic YouTube Video of the Week and then...

OUTRO OF



Gustavus out! :D
 
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