Gustavus Fails at Sleuth: Shades of Mystery Episode 1- Dear God, What Is That Thing?!
Hello audience, it's me, Gustavus, and you're reading Gustavus Fails at Gaming, the series where I play some awesome games and fail at them spectacularly. Unfortunately, I was pretty busy this weekend with all of the college and NS work that I had to do, and so I could not play Call of Duty: Black Ops.
But don't worry, I will try and play it this coming weekend, and then every week thereafter until I beat it.
For now, I would like to thank Swakistek for giving me the inspiration to play this game, which he mentioned in passing as being more fun than browsing through the old EuroUniversity Administrative Archivivizaza- I forget what it's called already. But anyway, although this is a free and very simplistic Flash game where you play detective, I really have had a lot of fun with it before I even started playing it.
I will post Gustavus Fails at Gaming posts about this game and about it its predecessor, Sleuth Noir, as often as I can. And, if the angels smile on me, I might also be able to do Call of Duty: Black Ops, maybe a revival of N.O.V.A. 2, and Back to the Future: The Game (which will release a free episode in a few days!) It's gonna be four or five games worth of fail! :lol:
First, go to the site http://shades.playsleuth.com/. Make sure you have the latest version of Adobe Flash for optimal performance. If you don't have an account, you press a Create Detective button, and then you start by customizing your detective's appearance- eyes, nose, glasses, mouth, etc.
Most of the options for these features are either drawn by five year olds (for your facial features), make you look like you were simply baked too long in a pizza oven (rather than being any actual shade of skin color), or make you look like you're drunk or on something. But eventually, as I tinkered around a little bit with appearances and random name generators, I started to see a character taking shape. And, with a, "Howdy, y'all!," Billy Chancellor was born. Yes, somebody in this world actually has the name Chancellor. What, audience?! It sounded southern to me, OK? Don't judge me!h43r:
Ah, yes, I bet he gets ALL the girls at the Texas barbecues.
Now, my young Chancellor, what background shall I choose for you? The game gave me six to choose from. Here they are in their entirety:
Reformed Burglar
A product of the streets, you once made your living from the carefully hidden savings of your fellow citizens. Age eventually brought with it compassion, however, and you were forced to confront the suffering you'd brought upon your victims.
Now, determined to pay back your debt to society, you've chosen to direct your efforts to solving the most heinous crimes in the city.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Disillusioned Police Detective
You used to be a rising star in the city police force. You made detective young, and realized your life's ambition when you were transfered to homicide. It didn't take long after that before you realized just how few murders were actually solved in this city. Corrupt cops and ineffectual city officials made doing your job almost impossible.
So, you quit the force and went into business as a private eye.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Disgraced Doctor
Although not born into riches, it didn't take you long to achieve them for yourself as a successful doctor. It took you even less time to lose it all, when you refused to declare that a murder victim had died of natural causes. You made some powerful enemies and lost your wealth and your career.
Never one to be easily beaten, you've started a new career as a private detective.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Freelance Investigative Reporter
Trained as a writer and a journalist, your real talent has always been in getting to the bottom of things other people want to keep covered up. Your blunt writing has earned you the ire of the editors of all the papers in town, so you're not selling many stories these days.
Luckily for you, your ability to get to the ugly truth will serve you well in your new life as a detective.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Retired Lawyer
After years of working as an attorney, you have a knack for changing other people's minds, without their realizing they've changed at all. Unfortunately, you have a bit of a gambling problem, and you seem to have squandered away your retirement savings. So, you've decided to go back to work as a private eye.
You figure it will be a relief to make a living by finding out the truth, rather than by pretending you already know it.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Moonlighting Dilettante
Your wealthy parents have always considered you to be a failure, so even if you are broke, there's no way you're crawling back to them now. Between your genteel upbringing, and the degenerates you've chosen to spend your adult life around, you've learned how to deal with all types.
Determined to make a success of yourself without your parents' help, you've decided to try your hand at being a private eye.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Eenie, meanie, miney, Retired Lawyer! It was partially that, and the fact that there was something slimey about my character's appearance and used car salesman-like smile that screamed either the lawyer or the dilettante. Then I picked lawyer, because as a lawyer Billy Chancellor seemed like the kind of guy who was more than willing to break a few faces to make the court go his way. I mean, come on! Just one look at him and you'll know what I mean! :lol:
MIDTRO OF THE WORD TUTORIAL OVER A STACK OF FILES!
The Beginning
Billy: "The law looked so much different from the other side of things.
It looked exactly like a big pile of cash. So much money I never thought I could burn through it all. Turns out, I was wrong."
Me: "It looked like a lot of laundered cash and *cough* cocaine *cough*- but don't tell anyone. Turns out, I was an idiot."
Billy: "Now the money's all gone and nobody in their right mind would hire a used-up shyster with a gambling problem."
Me: "The last people I asked gave me the phone number for Assholes Anonymous."
Billy: "Enter Patricia. She recognized me on the street one afternoon from her time writing an old law column in the local rag, the Daily Monitor. We kept the "how you do's" short, and I was ready to get back to my self pity when she asked if I was looking for work."
Me: "This reunion was totally not awkward at all. We had only been together for three years before she dumped me and took everything, including my dignity- nothing serious."
Billy: "A man named Zimmerman had come to her looking for help when his brother was found dead. The cops were looking to pin it on him, probably out of laziness more than any probable cause."
Me: "Would this have anything to do with the Zimmerman Telegram? World War I reference for the win!"
Billy: "It wasn't exactly my dream job, but I didn't have a lot of options."
Me: "I could have just said, 'Thanks, but I like unemployment and homelessness better' and clawed my eyes out at the sight of my ex. But somehow I didn't..."
T-t-t-that's all, audience! If you're reading this, leave a comment and tune in for next episode, where I will solve the case using a liberal amount of torture- I mean "deduction." Gustavus out!
Hello audience, it's me, Gustavus, and you're reading Gustavus Fails at Gaming, the series where I play some awesome games and fail at them spectacularly. Unfortunately, I was pretty busy this weekend with all of the college and NS work that I had to do, and so I could not play Call of Duty: Black Ops.
But don't worry, I will try and play it this coming weekend, and then every week thereafter until I beat it. For now, I would like to thank Swakistek for giving me the inspiration to play this game, which he mentioned in passing as being more fun than browsing through the old EuroUniversity Administrative Archivivizaza- I forget what it's called already.
But anyway, although this is a free and very simplistic Flash game where you play detective, I really have had a lot of fun with it before I even started playing it.I will post Gustavus Fails at Gaming posts about this game and about it its predecessor, Sleuth Noir, as often as I can. And, if the angels smile on me, I might also be able to do Call of Duty: Black Ops, maybe a revival of N.O.V.A. 2, and Back to the Future: The Game (which will release a free episode in a few days!
) It's gonna be four or five games worth of fail! :lol:First, go to the site http://shades.playsleuth.com/. Make sure you have the latest version of Adobe Flash for optimal performance. If you don't have an account, you press a Create Detective button, and then you start by customizing your detective's appearance- eyes, nose, glasses, mouth, etc.
Most of the options for these features are either drawn by five year olds (for your facial features), make you look like you were simply baked too long in a pizza oven (rather than being any actual shade of skin color), or make you look like you're drunk or on something. But eventually, as I tinkered around a little bit with appearances and random name generators, I started to see a character taking shape. And, with a, "Howdy, y'all!," Billy Chancellor was born. Yes, somebody in this world actually has the name Chancellor. What, audience?! It sounded southern to me, OK? Don't judge me!
h43r:Ah, yes, I bet he gets ALL the girls at the Texas barbecues.
Now, my young Chancellor, what background shall I choose for you? The game gave me six to choose from. Here they are in their entirety:
Reformed Burglar
A product of the streets, you once made your living from the carefully hidden savings of your fellow citizens. Age eventually brought with it compassion, however, and you were forced to confront the suffering you'd brought upon your victims.
Now, determined to pay back your debt to society, you've chosen to direct your efforts to solving the most heinous crimes in the city.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Disillusioned Police Detective
You used to be a rising star in the city police force. You made detective young, and realized your life's ambition when you were transfered to homicide. It didn't take long after that before you realized just how few murders were actually solved in this city. Corrupt cops and ineffectual city officials made doing your job almost impossible.
So, you quit the force and went into business as a private eye.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Disgraced Doctor
Although not born into riches, it didn't take you long to achieve them for yourself as a successful doctor. It took you even less time to lose it all, when you refused to declare that a murder victim had died of natural causes. You made some powerful enemies and lost your wealth and your career.
Never one to be easily beaten, you've started a new career as a private detective.
Starting Contact: Police Desk Sergeant
*****
Freelance Investigative Reporter
Trained as a writer and a journalist, your real talent has always been in getting to the bottom of things other people want to keep covered up. Your blunt writing has earned you the ire of the editors of all the papers in town, so you're not selling many stories these days.
Luckily for you, your ability to get to the ugly truth will serve you well in your new life as a detective.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Retired Lawyer
After years of working as an attorney, you have a knack for changing other people's minds, without their realizing they've changed at all. Unfortunately, you have a bit of a gambling problem, and you seem to have squandered away your retirement savings. So, you've decided to go back to work as a private eye.
You figure it will be a relief to make a living by finding out the truth, rather than by pretending you already know it.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Moonlighting Dilettante
Your wealthy parents have always considered you to be a failure, so even if you are broke, there's no way you're crawling back to them now. Between your genteel upbringing, and the degenerates you've chosen to spend your adult life around, you've learned how to deal with all types.
Determined to make a success of yourself without your parents' help, you've decided to try your hand at being a private eye.
Starting Contact: Newspaper Reporter
*****
Eenie, meanie, miney, Retired Lawyer! It was partially that, and the fact that there was something slimey about my character's appearance and used car salesman-like smile that screamed either the lawyer or the dilettante. Then I picked lawyer, because as a lawyer Billy Chancellor seemed like the kind of guy who was more than willing to break a few faces to make the court go his way. I mean, come on! Just one look at him and you'll know what I mean! :lol:
MIDTRO OF THE WORD TUTORIAL OVER A STACK OF FILES!
The Beginning
Billy: "The law looked so much different from the other side of things.
It looked exactly like a big pile of cash. So much money I never thought I could burn through it all. Turns out, I was wrong."
Me: "It looked like a lot of laundered cash and *cough* cocaine *cough*- but don't tell anyone. Turns out, I was an idiot."
Billy: "Now the money's all gone and nobody in their right mind would hire a used-up shyster with a gambling problem."
Me: "The last people I asked gave me the phone number for Assholes Anonymous."
Billy: "Enter Patricia. She recognized me on the street one afternoon from her time writing an old law column in the local rag, the Daily Monitor. We kept the "how you do's" short, and I was ready to get back to my self pity when she asked if I was looking for work."
Me: "This reunion was totally not awkward at all. We had only been together for three years before she dumped me and took everything, including my dignity- nothing serious."
Billy: "A man named Zimmerman had come to her looking for help when his brother was found dead. The cops were looking to pin it on him, probably out of laziness more than any probable cause."
Me: "Would this have anything to do with the Zimmerman Telegram? World War I reference for the win!"
Billy: "It wasn't exactly my dream job, but I didn't have a lot of options."
Me: "I could have just said, 'Thanks, but I like unemployment and homelessness better' and clawed my eyes out at the sight of my ex. But somehow I didn't..."
T-t-t-that's all, audience! If you're reading this, leave a comment and tune in for next episode, where I will solve the case using a liberal amount of torture- I mean "deduction."
Gustavus out! 
