The Good, The Bad, & The Critic #1
Welcome to The Good, The Bad, & The Critic! Here, I'll review movies that are currently out in theaters (or if I can't go to the movies, I'll review classic movies and video games).
Today I'll be looking at Cowboys & Aliens, starring Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford, and Olivia Wilde and directed by Jon Favreau, which...well, the premise is kind of self-explanatory. This movie is based on the popular graphic novel of the same name released in 2006. I remember reading this comic, and its story had me hooked. When I told my family members that I had read it, they kept asking me in the theater, "Do you remember this or that or this or that?"
I didn't...and now I know why. Rather than base the movie on the comic book, they decided to make a completely new story with numerous screenwriters. *Sigh* Let's get into it...
Plot
WARNING: HERE BE SPOILERS
Daniel Craig wakes up in the desert, injured, with no memory of how he got there after ordering a martini shaken, not stirred, and a strange blue bracelet attached to his arm. He promptly kicks the asses of people who want to bring him and wanders into the town of Absolution, where he finds out he's a wanted murderer named Jake Lonergan.
Jake soon runs into conflict with Colonel Dolarhyde, the bigshot cattle rancher played by Harrison Ford who controls everything (including law enforcement). However, they have to set aside their differences when aliens promptly tear their town a new one.
If you can guess where this is going from here, then you're wrong! ALIENS ENSLAVE US ALL!!!! The end!
Well, not really, but after a solid start that gives us a semi-intriguing mystery surrounding Jake and who he really is, typical action/science fiction cliches begin to take over. That doesn't mean that the plot isn't well paced or doesn't have really awesome moments- those come aplenty. However, this movie had a really great premise, was marketed as something that was going to blow your mind, and pretty much plays it safe, squandering a lot of potentially thought-provoking ideas.
With the plot, what you see is what you get- cowboys done well and aliens done well. You'll enjoy it for the duration if you're into action films like I am. But after it takes you along for yet another big-budget CGI rollercoaster ride, you'll wish that everybody had taken some more risks with the story.
Performances
While the story is unexceptional but solid for what it's worth, the only really good acting in the movie comes from the two stars, Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford.
I liked Sean Connery's James Bond films better because he comes as suave and confident but rugged and self-reliant; however, in Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace, Daniel Craig plays a very cool, calculating, steely-eyed secret agent well. He goes for much the same schtick here. It was a bit disconcerting for me to hear him try on a Texas accent, and one wonders if he is even human at times, but Craig's lone wolf performance is once-again spot on.
Harrison Ford also hits his nail on the head, despite Colonel Dolarhyde being gruff, sarcastic, and bitter, the complete opposite of more heroic roles he's taken on in the past, most notably Han Solo and Indiana Jones. Both of them are lone wolves who are also tough, cool, and yet romantic and somewhat cynical at the same time. All Ford has to do here is focus more on the toughness and make him more angry to play Dolarhyde, while showing just a bit of a sensitive side, and that's exactly what he does here. However, he just isn't given much screen time.
Olivia Wilde plays an alien girl, and I swear that, like on House, she was probably only chosen because of her sex appeal, because I cannot stand her acting. It's just so wooden...GAH! I could see Craig and Wilde falling in love and having equally robotic babies on board their alien ship, that's how unemotional they are. The rest of the performances come off as either OK but flat, annoying, or annoyingly flat.
Presentation
The third part of any movie is the presentation- which I believe these days is composed of graphics (CGI, lighting, filters, etc.), music, and setting. The aliens are great and provide plenty of jump scares. Also, the scene where the aliens initially attack the town and everybody's just standing there as strange lights (in an era before electricity) come out of the distance and then are like, "Run for your lives!" as the aliens pummel them into the Stone Age is good fun. And, as far as I can tell (not being a Western history scholar) the setting looks period accurate. Everything else about the presentation, including the majority of the CGI, is OK, but not memorable.
The Verdict
Pluses
+Attempt at an original idea by Hollywood
+Great start, and well told throughout
+Strong performances by Craig and Ford
+Attempts to be period accurate, and has scary CGI aliens
Minuses
-Completely diverts from graphic novel
-Majority of plot is extremely predictable
-Wilde and other characters are at best OK
-Most of the CGI is obvious and doesn't add much
GBC Rating: ***1/2
[hide=Ratings Guide]*: Sucks Balls- fake your death if you have to
**: Sucks- pretend to have the plague
***: Meh- rent from Blockbuster, if those still exist
****: Pretty Awesome- worth getting buckets of shitty popcorn at the theater for
*****: Head-Explosively Awesome- BUY THE COLLECTOR'S EDITION!!!![/hide]
Welcome to The Good, The Bad, & The Critic! Here, I'll review movies that are currently out in theaters (or if I can't go to the movies, I'll review classic movies and video games).
Today I'll be looking at Cowboys & Aliens, starring Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford, and Olivia Wilde and directed by Jon Favreau, which...well, the premise is kind of self-explanatory. This movie is based on the popular graphic novel of the same name released in 2006. I remember reading this comic, and its story had me hooked. When I told my family members that I had read it, they kept asking me in the theater, "Do you remember this or that or this or that?"
I didn't...and now I know why. Rather than base the movie on the comic book, they decided to make a completely new story with numerous screenwriters. *Sigh* Let's get into it...
Plot
WARNING: HERE BE SPOILERS
Daniel Craig wakes up in the desert, injured, with no memory of how he got there after ordering a martini shaken, not stirred, and a strange blue bracelet attached to his arm. He promptly kicks the asses of people who want to bring him and wanders into the town of Absolution, where he finds out he's a wanted murderer named Jake Lonergan.
Jake soon runs into conflict with Colonel Dolarhyde, the bigshot cattle rancher played by Harrison Ford who controls everything (including law enforcement). However, they have to set aside their differences when aliens promptly tear their town a new one.
If you can guess where this is going from here, then you're wrong! ALIENS ENSLAVE US ALL!!!! The end!
Well, not really, but after a solid start that gives us a semi-intriguing mystery surrounding Jake and who he really is, typical action/science fiction cliches begin to take over. That doesn't mean that the plot isn't well paced or doesn't have really awesome moments- those come aplenty. However, this movie had a really great premise, was marketed as something that was going to blow your mind, and pretty much plays it safe, squandering a lot of potentially thought-provoking ideas.
With the plot, what you see is what you get- cowboys done well and aliens done well. You'll enjoy it for the duration if you're into action films like I am. But after it takes you along for yet another big-budget CGI rollercoaster ride, you'll wish that everybody had taken some more risks with the story.
Performances
While the story is unexceptional but solid for what it's worth, the only really good acting in the movie comes from the two stars, Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford.
I liked Sean Connery's James Bond films better because he comes as suave and confident but rugged and self-reliant; however, in Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace, Daniel Craig plays a very cool, calculating, steely-eyed secret agent well. He goes for much the same schtick here. It was a bit disconcerting for me to hear him try on a Texas accent, and one wonders if he is even human at times, but Craig's lone wolf performance is once-again spot on.
Harrison Ford also hits his nail on the head, despite Colonel Dolarhyde being gruff, sarcastic, and bitter, the complete opposite of more heroic roles he's taken on in the past, most notably Han Solo and Indiana Jones. Both of them are lone wolves who are also tough, cool, and yet romantic and somewhat cynical at the same time. All Ford has to do here is focus more on the toughness and make him more angry to play Dolarhyde, while showing just a bit of a sensitive side, and that's exactly what he does here. However, he just isn't given much screen time.
Olivia Wilde plays an alien girl, and I swear that, like on House, she was probably only chosen because of her sex appeal, because I cannot stand her acting. It's just so wooden...GAH! I could see Craig and Wilde falling in love and having equally robotic babies on board their alien ship, that's how unemotional they are. The rest of the performances come off as either OK but flat, annoying, or annoyingly flat.
Presentation
The third part of any movie is the presentation- which I believe these days is composed of graphics (CGI, lighting, filters, etc.), music, and setting. The aliens are great and provide plenty of jump scares. Also, the scene where the aliens initially attack the town and everybody's just standing there as strange lights (in an era before electricity) come out of the distance and then are like, "Run for your lives!" as the aliens pummel them into the Stone Age is good fun. And, as far as I can tell (not being a Western history scholar) the setting looks period accurate. Everything else about the presentation, including the majority of the CGI, is OK, but not memorable.
The Verdict
Pluses
+Attempt at an original idea by Hollywood
+Great start, and well told throughout
+Strong performances by Craig and Ford
+Attempts to be period accurate, and has scary CGI aliens
Minuses
-Completely diverts from graphic novel
-Majority of plot is extremely predictable
-Wilde and other characters are at best OK
-Most of the CGI is obvious and doesn't add much
GBC Rating: ***1/2
[hide=Ratings Guide]*: Sucks Balls- fake your death if you have to
**: Sucks- pretend to have the plague
***: Meh- rent from Blockbuster, if those still exist
****: Pretty Awesome- worth getting buckets of shitty popcorn at the theater for
*****: Head-Explosively Awesome- BUY THE COLLECTOR'S EDITION!!!![/hide]
