Ask Sopo
Europeia's Advice Column
Dear Long,
I struggled with insomnia myself for a number of years. My doctor prescribed sleeping pills, but I found that they left me drowsy in the morning. After a month-long stint in rehab for pill addiction, I decided that they were not the solution to my insomnia. On the advice of a friend, I tried a natural sleep aid. Here's what you do:
In a cocktail shaker, combine the following:
6oz 190-proof Moonshine
4 crushed aspirin
Shake and pour into a martini glass rimmed with Vicks VapoRub. Enjoy!
Sincerely,
Sopo
Dear Don't Know,
Having a low IQ can be a barrier to finding a job, maintaining relationships, and generally participating in society. Do not fear! Europeia is a great place for idiots like yourself. Please contact Integration Services for your "assistance."*
Sincerely,
Sopo
*Ask Sopo is not responsible for punches doled by Integration Services
Dear Shelly,
Turtles are quite delicious, but inherently dangerous. Turtle obsession is a serious, rising epidemic in NationStates that many regions are unprepared to deal with. Overexposure to turtles may lead to irresponsible behavior, including watching Dr. Who and annoying region-mates. If you are experiencing any of the symptoms of turtle obsession, please leave NationStates immediately.
Sincerely,
Sopo
Ask Sopo is now a part of the EBC family. If you have a question for Dear Sopo that you would like to appear in the column, please send a message to Sopo, who just may provide you with the answers you've been seeking.
